I am not an entirely squeamish girl. I don’t like blood or frogs, but I can handle poop and vomit. I prefer not to deal with rodents, bugs, or dead birds, but when forced into action, I can manage without too much unnecessary drama. However, one of the advantages of being married to Tim is that I don’t have to.
This is not a one-sided street. Tim reaps many benefits being married to me. For example, I am the one who told him that “just because you can still fit into the jeans and striped polo you purchased in 1992, doesn’t mean you should wear them.” And, I am the one who gently mentioned that “just because you know how to efficiently kill a chicken doesn’t mean you should use those details as your go-to bedtime story.”
I believe I do my part to make Tim’s life better, and so when I find a fat hairy spider in the bathtub, I call in the big guns. It is part of my marriage benefits package. I get health insurance, car maintenance, guard-dog protection, and spider rescuing. I also get heavy lifting, drain de-clogging, and chauffeur services.
Tim was recently travelling for work and while he was gone, my four-year-old found a GIGANTIC spider in the bathtub. I got a cup and piece of cardboard and used these tools to trap and transport the spider to our porch; I confess that I emitted a rather girly shriek as I released him to the backyard. He was massive, hairy, and pissed off.
The night Tim returned home, I filled him in on our week. “Oh, and I captured an arachnid. Not just any arachnid, a steroid-taking, wife-beating, prison-escapee spider who wanted to eat our baby.”
Tim was obviously impressed. Today he sent this photo to my inbox:
Check out the other winners of the Nikon small world photography competition.